Q and A'S
email your questions to thaloveguru@yahoo.com



Q:  anonymous

Ok...I have some questions for the love guru. I keep attracting my "type" fine, nice body, good job, own crib, etc but i have found that they work alot or in the gym alot...my response is.. you make time for what you want to make time for. I know they didn't get where they are career wise or physically without doing what they do. I have low patience and i require attention so i dismiss the n***** and keep it moving. My girls say i am too picky. I say I know what i want and won't settle. What do you think? Am I wrong? I just need a male's prospective, and you seem to have alot of good answers.


Another question... how can a woman weed out the bad from the good? How can an attractive woman tell if a n***** is looking for just a f*** or a relationship?


A:  tha love guru

Well its good that you are dating your "type" that means your on the right path. If a man is very successful business wise then depending on what type of business it is, it may very well be time consuming. If this is the case then you have to decide if this man is special enough for you to compromise some things. Before  you start in on me compromising is not settling. People who truly care for each other SHOULD be willing to compromise with each other to make things work. If you feel that he's worth it and judging by him having all these qualities you want in a man then you two should come together with some type of schedule. Yes i know i know, i like spontaneity just as much as the next cat but if his career is time consuming its imperative that you plan. BOTH OF YOU come up with what you mutually agree is  a "reasonable" amount of time to be spent a week. Set the schedule and FOLLOW IT! Now if he continuously fails to adhere, then RED FLAG!!

MENTAL NOTE: A man is not going to spend alot of time with someone he's not that interested in, and just wants to bang! (let it bang let it bang doo doo doo) sorry that's my song! lol

This brings up another issue. If he isn't that interested he's probably not going to tell you unless he has coconuts the size of that famous bulldog in AMERICAN PIE! So he's going to lie and make excuses i.e I was working late, then was in the gym all day!! hmmmmmm. The most important thing is to find out if his work and time at the gym is an excuse or is it genuine. If its an excuse then he's lying to you and he's not that interested so fire him!! If its not an excuse and he has those qualities its worth compromising if you BOTH are willing to put in a little more effort and work.

One last thing. In dealing with relationships, It is true that men can pretty much sum up what role you will play in our lives within the first 30 mins maybe less. However sometimes it takes longer.  We might think initially "oh she has potential but later down the line your actions show us that we should have ran out the door on the first date! Vice versa, we might think oh she is just  gonna be someone to sleep around with every now and again, then months down the line you captivated our hearts. 

To sum it up, don't come on to strong, if a man wants to make time he will, even if its not as much as you want, and you will compromise if  the both of you can agree and adhere to an amount of time a week to spend with each other that you can live with. If your just getting to know this guy give him a little time to get to know you to determine if he even wants to sacrifice time. No pressure...less is more!

As for your other question about weeding out the good from the bad. I actually wrote a post on just that coincidentally entitled how to weed out the bad men from the good check it out! I hope its helpful. Good luck with your future relationships!!!


Q: anonymous

Love guru, I have a man i have been with for  three months now. At first we were having sex all day everyday! It was great. Now its like i almost have to beg him to sleep with me! I don't see him as much as i used too. He said there is nothing wrong he's just tired or he's working more. What do you think is the problem? Do you think he's not attracted anymore, or he's cheating on me?

A: Tha Love Guru

Well i don't think it's necessarily that he's not attracted anymore. It depends on alot I really would like more information. Key point is how fast did you sleep with him? You know there is that initial NEW THRILL that men and women both get when having sex with someone new. Every here that expression "the thrill is gone!" well this is probably true. If you slept with him off the bat then you two really didn't give yourselves enough time to figure out what you really had in common with each other, other then the physical. So WHEN THE THRILL IS GONE chances are he is too! Your main focus when you meet a new guy should be to find out if he just wants the booty! Refer to my post how to weed out the bad men from the good 

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